Cell Phones On The Table Offend Tenderblog, Bauer, You?

Pretty f-ing tired of being told what to eat, and now how to eat, by Michael Bauer. Tyranny of the minority. How about I pay the bill, get the food, and put what I want on the table? Glasses, for example. I wish Bauer would get off the high horse. It's food, not church.

I do bump the table. Because I have to pee a lot. Especially when I'm forced to drink beer.

Also, phones should be left on the table, period. While I'm all for people not talking on the phone while others are trying to savor their offal-bacon-celery root cupcakes, or whatever, there are reasons to keep your phone on the table. What reasons? Like, not carrying a purse. And a religious-like refusal to wear khakis. (I wear pants the snug my every curve, thank you.) I refuse to appease a few critics who want every meal in the city to be like their families' tables back in the day.

So: no. Mind your business.

Also, people in Europe poop into a hole in the ground.

Waiters bitch about all their customers behind their backs. It doesn't matter WHAT you do, they will have something mean to say about you to their co-workers.

Anyone who ever worked as a waiter or is friends with one knows what I'm talking about.

So go ahead, leave your phone on the table or whatever and let them bitch. It's fine.

I didn't buy a $300 phone to sit on it. Before I could just leave it in my pocket until I got bored with everyone at the table and thought of someone to text.
Everyone would notice my phone then and by their looks, they were envious.
I think Bauer once said texting is not ok at the table so I can't do that any more.

Since there are no other use for them, phones should come out and be placed on the table. Just like guns were back in the olden days. It's important to know who has the fanciest gun.

Interesting comments regarding Bauer's remarks about cellphones on tables; endtime signs in each and every one of them.

How will people know you have an iphone, a sleek, shiny, polished, sexy iphone, an iphone that says look at how cool, savvy, sophisticated this person is and how great in bed he/she must be, if you can't put it next to you on the table?

I keep my phone in my pocket, because I'm forgetful and don't want to leave it behind.

But I think it might be fun to start littering restaurant tables with broken secondhand phones in the hopes that it might give a few SF Gate commenters and diaspora'd have-nots aneurysms.

My pants are too tight to put a phone in the front pocket, it would get smashed in the back pocket. If I have a jacket it goes in that pocket, if not either on the seat under my leg or somewhere on the table.

I always found it hilarious that all my anti-cell phone friends only seem to call me from other people's cell phones.